Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
