i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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