elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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