How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
