would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
