I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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