I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize