Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
