Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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