Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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