Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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