the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize