Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
COCAINE IS GR8
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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