oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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