i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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