this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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