this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
