i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
