i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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