How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
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Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
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The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize