Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
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You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
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He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
My day in three words: secret purse cake
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
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