I think I died a long time ago.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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