I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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