Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
