Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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