Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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