i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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