I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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