I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
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