I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
