Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
