the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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