Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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