You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
