Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
