What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
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All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
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I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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