worst night to have a conscience
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
