the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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