His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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