is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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