you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
