I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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