I want to walk on stilts...naked
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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