You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
