I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
