people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
