she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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