She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize