You can't motorboat a personality
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
