She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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