That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
The feeling are messing with the penis
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
